Thursday, November 8, 2007
Emotionally Unstable/ 10:45 PM

Okay, To start off, i'm in a bitchy fit and i'm gonna do alot of venting in this post.
For the weak hearted, please skip this post.


I don't get the meaning of the word "Family". Like seriously. I know what mother, father, brother, sister means but what the hell does family means?!?!?


Isn't the purpose of having a family is to belong. no matter what you do, family sticks together and no one can replace your place in the family cause THAT spot is specially reserved for you and no one else can fit into THAT spot. But what if no one cares anymore? what if the same shit happens again and again? And what if your caught in the middle. torn between your parents and you only sibling?


Well, i don't give a damn about my spot in the family anymore. If keeping that spot means that i have to choose between my parents and my only sibling than, count me out!! coz i dun fucking care bout my place in the family anymore. They think the battle thats been going on and on and on between them do NOT affect me. Well they are fucking wrong!!


Tell me. How can i choose between my parents and my only brother. I want to do right by them. But they are making it soooo fucking difficult for me!!! With one asking me to do the opposite of the other.


I've spent sooo many fuken hours talking to both of you, trying to make things better but what has it done? NOTHING!!! It has not done a motherfucking thing!! All the hours trying to patch up the family again, gone with one single quarrel. And I, yes I, have to start trying from scratch again.


Trying and failing. Trying and failing. Trying and failing.


I don't think i can do this anymore. I'm fucking fed up with your fucking attitudes!!! What do you think i am?!?! a fucking pawn that you can move anywhere on the chess board?!?! i have and mind of my own and i don't follow orders blindly. i have feelings,and everytime you guys quarrel, my heart dies just a little. And now that there's nothing left, i just feel pain and anger and sadness.


And if one of ya'll are not there to take the blame for something, I'm the target board. I'm the person you shout at. eventhough i did nothing wrong. I've tried sooo hard to help. I've tried sooo hard to make us a family again but everytime i try, you guys jusy bulldoze the wall i make to keep us together. And i'm running out of energy to make a new wall.


So, i guess what i'm trying to say is, I've finally stopped trying. I surrender. My white flag is up. You guy can carry on the battle if you want to but i'm out. I'm too tired to care anymore. I've past the stage of giving a shit bout you guys. You guys can quarrel all you like until you grow old and bitter and die. but I'm not living that way. I'm not gonna clean up after the mess you've made. I'm done doing that.


So now for all i care, what mother? what father? what brother?


If you push me again, adios!! i'll just say "Fuck you people. Since i'm insignificant to your life then, Fuck you. I'll go live somewhere else. Anywhere else.Coz it's definitely much better than this place you call home."



I'm just drained. And i want to sleep.



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Monday, October 29, 2007
Fat bitch ain't got nothing on me!!!!/ 11:12 AM

Bored!!! i'm sooooooo fucking bored!!!!1



Well, as you might or might not know, I'm grounded. Yeap as hard as it is to believe, I am sooo fucking grounded. Thanks to some fucking fat bitch whos leher berbabat, perut gelumbung macam hot air balloon and muke macam tahi babi!!!(for those who dun understand malay, i said that this fat bitch has loads of fats in the neck, her stomach if as big as a hot air balloon and her face looks like hog's shit!!!)


Writing this DOES NOT! make me feel better!! Because of that stupid shit, I'm freaking grounded....Well by now, i sure you're curious as to what she did to make me grounded...okay, i'm gonna tell you the whole story now....



First of all, i'm very close to my brother and his friends....we get along really well and some of them are really close to me that they tell me their secrets and sometimes ask for advice on certain issues (since i'm the only dependable one to give advice in the whole group) Well, it all started when this Friend of mine, asked for my advice and shit....and i sympathize with him so we became really close...and because of that, he's girlfriend (now ex) got jealous...hmmmm, typical typical story right....i know!!(how fucking sad....)


Anyways, to make it clear to BOTH parties!! i only treat him as a friend/brother and nothing more, so if you think differently, that's not my fucking fault is it now? I've made it clear to both of you that i have no feelings what so ever towards that guy....so if you still think that i do, well i only have two words for you....FUCK YOU!!!


well on wtih the story, i was hanging out with him and the others when suddenly this fat bitch came and started calling me names (one of which i totally agree with her, bitch, i am a bitch and i'm not gonna deny it) and yeap i just sat and continue blowing out smoke like theres no fat bitch there staring at me....eventually, things got ugly....well actually, things started to become ugly when she stepped into the picture.....(whahahaahah) anyways, did i mention she brought her posse with her....all of them are ugly, no wonder he likes me more....


I got up and wanted to leave before things got out of hand....she suddenly advance towards me to stand right in my way....and i was like "please move aside, you're blocking the entire path way" and she was "biar arr!!! kau pompan sial! kau nk lelaki gi arr!! asal kau nk amek orang lain punye laki?!?! betina sial!!" (this is a direct qoute) and i was like "I did not steal you're boyfriend nor did i steal any other girl's boyfriend, so please move aside." by then my patience was wearing thin!! and i just wanted to smack her fucking face....FYI i'm not a boyfriend stealer nor am i going to be. the only person who steals boyfriends is DARSJEN!! but i'm not gonna bitch about her coz this post is dedicated to bitchin about fat bitch!!


she started pushing me, and that was when i lost my temper and i punched her....(ooops, i admit, wrong move) well yes i got her right at her cheek but i don't think she felt anything with that extra cushion all over her face....she tried to punch me back but i ducked and tried to get away(i'm not gonna stick around when this bitch get all loco!!) but for a fat bitch, she was quite fast...and she caught me by my arm....(well now you're wondering what happenned to the guys, they're fucking useless and just sat and watch, claiming later that they knew i was going to win what with my power punches...loads of bullshitter)


To her credit, she left a few marks on me...usually, i won't get any in a fight (shows how out of action i am these days....hiaz....must train more!! i go to the ring at yishun with my brother and some of his friends to train...just for fun....FREAKY!!)anyways, i have a few bruises on my arms now due to the incessant blocking i had to do coz she fight like some crazed retard....


well it all ended when i accidentally kicked her at the side of her stomach.....she cried....i did felt bad....i still do...coz it's been such a long time since i got into a fight...and i guess i'm getting all soft and shit.....but she still deserved it, i tried to let well enough alone but noooooo, she had to go push me around....i guess she thought that she was bigger than me(vertically and horizontally) she could push me around....that was what made me lose respect for her....i mean if some girl stole my boyfriend away i'd definitely want to get back at her....but if that girl was like smaller and thinner than me and i knew that i could beat her up easy, i'd just let it go and be happy with calling her names....but than i can't say the same for my "boyfriend" i'd definitely will kich his ass....


Other than that, coming home with a few bruises on me was the final straw for my parents...and they grounded me, well it won't hold, but i'm content to sitting around at home today...

few words for the fat bitch,

Pray that you do not cross my path for the whole of your lifetime! cause if i happen to see you anytime soon with my unstable anger right now, you'll fucking get it from me...now that i've looked back upon what happened, i wish to god i didn't felt obliged to not hurt you. Coz i easily could have and i would if given the second chance....because you can't keep your boyfriend in place you take it out on me....how fucking cowardly of you. If i see your fucking fat face again, you'll know what to expect. So pray bitch, pray. Coz i WILL be your hell!!!


and to het posse,

WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING WITH HER?!??!?! she's fat and she's ugly!!! If you have not notice, the ground moves when she walks!!!! SERIOUSLY!!!! and you could so have done better...i mean what kind of friend is she to drag you people into this....well i could only say this...DUMP HER LIKE YOU DUMP YOUR GARBAGE DOWN THE GARBAGE SHOOT!!!!


and to her so call ex-boyfriend,

If, you drag me into any kind of problem or situation like this that pisses me off, you'll get it from me....even if i treat you like my very close friend. after this episode, i'm no longer tolerant of any of your problems or your fucking face right now....I'm still in a I-WANNA-PUNCH-YOUR-FUCKING-FACE kinda mood...so stay away from me for the next few weeks....yeap..WEEKS!!!


and to the others (guys),


what kind of friends are you?!??! after the episode, i ask why didn't you pull us apart? and you guys say "alah, confirm kau dah menang, kau pukol dier satu kali je dah K.O" SOOO FUCKING WHAT?!?!? okay i'm not bragging but i knew i could take her, but have you thought that i do not want to hurt her?? i do not want to make her cry?? she already thinks that i stole her boyfriend!! but beating her up!??!?! for as long as the fight lasted the only blow that i didn't purposely was the punch i threww at her face....even the kick was accidental!!! other than that, she was the one throwing the punches, she was the one who advance when i tried to back up. I was the one blocking her every fucking punches, slaps, nails(scratcing)....so i guess i have to rethink hanging around with you people....

And for the others out there,

please, do not mess with me..cause i'm in no mood to fuck around....i may have that record of getting into alot of fights and other shits in the past, but i am sooooo tired of it, and i do not want to do it again!! so just mind your own business and we'll get along alright...

thats all for this post....

DON'T FUCKING MESS AROUND WITH ME!!!

PS: i'm still pissed that i'm grounded for something that was caused by another!!! bloody motherfucker!!

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Friday, September 14, 2007
Fasting months is HERE!!! (yay....)/ 8:13 PM

OHH, it's september already...time flies really fast dun it....the finals are coming in two weeks time....well that's not really the reason for me posting this, the reason is because

BULAN PUASE IS HERE!!!
It's already the second day!! WOW!! before you know it, it's already hari raye!! wooohooo!!! money here i come!! well that's not really what i'm looking foward too....other than that is the food and nice traditional clothes....anyways, I just want to say Happy fasting to all the muslims out there....Bersabar....wahaha....anyways, it's only a month that you have to sacrifice for...put 1 month against 11 months, it's a pretty good deal....well think of it this way, if you ain't got mush discipline, this fasting month would help you lose weight!!! weeeee!! i guess theres a plus sign afterall!! wahahah
okay then leave you to you fasting and btw!!! i curse you people to do really well for finals!!!! yeah!!!!

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Belo's Blog!
The usual and unusual lifestyle of mine! My life which is a rollercoaster ride is here for everyone to like it, love it, hate it...whatever!
Heya there! I'm Meera, or aka Belo or POM POM (belo pomelo) I'm 17 this year but will be turning 18 really realy soon! Birthdays on the 3rd of freaking March! And i guess im currently wasting life away in poly, taking Aerospace Technology which im naturally brilliant at! teeeheee! Waiting and hoping that i would have an exciting life ahead but life is dull, so i make what i want out of it. Oh! PS: Whatever i say here is my own personal views, thought and oppinion...so if you dun like it, then well theres only one solution. PISS OFF!

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